Desire Avenue

Pinched this from my offspring's room this afternoon. Anyone else seen it? Now I like a strange film, but this has to be one of the most bizarre movies I've ever seen. I think it's based on a graphic novel or something? Keanu Reeves plays a hard-boiled type who spends his time sending impertinent demons back to hell. He's dying of lung cancer, and his soul is damned for reasons that you don't find out till near the end of the film. He's trying to 'buy' his way into heaven by getting rid of these demons, only he's informed by the Angel Gabriel halfway through that this isn't going to work. Gabriel has gone mental, which is the kind of thing that happens when you're played by Tilda Swinton. Meanwhile, the son of Satan has got his hands on the Spear of Destiny (the spear that killed Christ on the cross) and has plans to take over zee vorld!!

Throw in the lead singer of Bush as bad angel Balthazar, a psychic priest who hears the voices of the dead when he puts his hands on newspapers, a small ferrety man with glasses who lives in a bowling alley and spends his time collecting artefacts such as a dragon's breath flame-thrower, Rachel Weisz as a cop who always seems to know when to point her gun at a bad guy and is trying to get her dead sister's soul released from hell, Lucifer popping up in a nice white suit and .... well, I don't know what you get.

Complete hokum, but oddly enjoyable and with some killer dialogue. My new favourite film quote, the Angel Gabriel to Constantine:

'You're dying because you've smoked thirty cigarettes a day since you were fifteen. You're going to hell because you took a life. You're fucked.'

I have this on dvd .Its taken from the dc/vertigo monthly comic Hellblazer ,thats been published since 1987.I have the first 10 years .
Most Hellblazer fans hate this film ,mostly because it been americanised.
John Constantine is English,born in Liverpool,wears a shabby old beige raincoat and has blondehair.He's difinitely not just stepped out of The Matrix and Chas is a cockney London minicab driver ,not a New York Cabbie (but at least they kept the name).
But apart from these quibbles, the sspecial effects are pretty damn good,the script could be a lot worse and ,yes,Tilda Swinton is superb as the androgynous angel Gabriel.

SLIGHT SPOILER ALERT



Did you notice at the end ,when s/he
emerged from the pool that its wings had been cut off .This is a main storyline inthe original comic.

I did, I thought it was hilarious when she emerged from the pool with just singed stumps remaining! She was brilliant, somehow managing to make Gabriel both angelic and demented at the same time. One thing I didn't understand though Barrett, the part about Gabriel and Balthazar being 'half-breeds'? They're half-human?

I had no idea of the background, but it seemed as if it must come from a graphic novel or something, it had that feel to it. I can quite understand how the fans would be upset at the Americanisation, but then it probably wouldn't have been made at all if they'd kept the English setting, and I guess for people like me who didn't know the original stories it's a good introduction, anyway.

Poor Chas. Although I'm glad I let the disc run right to the end of the titles.

The guy who played Lucifer at the end was great too, not exactly what you'd expect. I find the Devil tends to be played a bit too cliche in movies (I'm thinking particularly of de Niro in 'Angelheart' and Pacino in 'Devil's Advocate', the typically sort of suave, elegant caricature), but this guy was kind of dishevelled and looked as if he was getting over a bout of flu or something and wasn't quite as cocksure as you'd expect the Devil to be. Loved that.

The effects were pretty good, I agree. The depiction of hell was great.

Oh yeah,that half demon/half human thing is a hollywood makey uppy thing.
The only half thing correct is that JC has demon blood in his veins,infused in him by the demon Nazgar in an earlier story.This comes in quite handy in alater tale when he meets and is bitten by "The king of the vampires",who isnt exactly partial to demon blood and ends up being dragged out into the sun and getting pissed on by john as the sun rises.....

I need to check this comic out.